An abomination. That’s the only word to describe the scene in Superior Court this morning, when instead of hearing opening arguments in the second round of the Marvis Chamaro, Jack Diehl murder trial, Judge Brenda Hollar had to read into the record a letter from the jury.

A letter, which can only be compared to a screed from a petulant adolescent, but sadly one which was signed by each of the 16 jurors brought over from St. Croix to hear this case after the first trial ended in a hung jury in March.

The jurors first requested a doubling of their daily stipend, from $40 to $80 – an impossibility since a juror’s pay is set by law. Even if the court wanted to, or had the resources to double the pay of these precious jurors, it could not. And the judge clearly was feeling no sympathy for these folks, perhaps because their second request was so pathetic.

It was a list of requested breakfast foods. I’m not sure what most of us typically have for breakfast, but this pack of 16 has clearly raised the bar.

Here are just a few of the foods they feel are necessary to start their day: Johnny cake, dumb bread, wheat bread, white bread, bacon, turkey bacon, cheese, meats, scrambled eggs, boiled eggs, pancakes, grapes, apples, bananas and pineapples, also coco tea and green tea.

One juror said sandwiches from Subway would be nice. This preference was added to the wish list when the judge called the jurors into the courtroom one by one to determine if they could act impartially in the event their menu and monetary requirements weren’t met.

Judge Hollar, eager to make sure the jurors were being well cared for during their inter-island jaunt, inquired as to whether their private hotel rooms were comfortable, and clearly they are. She asked whether the ride from St. Croix to St. Thomas on a private jet had been comfortable. Apparently it was.

Nevertheless, cereal, quiche and pastries just weren’t adequate to start their day, which, she reminded the group, is anchored by a hot, mid-day meal (and buoyed by a rack of snacks in the jury room), then capped off with a full-course dinner.

The judge pointed out to the jurors that their bountiful breakfast would likely inspire a mid-morning snooze, hardly a state that warrants double the usual jury pay, as this group was seeking.

“Have you ever served on a jury in St. Croix?” Judge Hollar asked each juror. Those who had served listed the splendid breakfast foods apparently served across the channel. Chicken, meatballs, saltfish patties. On and on. (Is it hard times only on St. Thomas, or has the recession skipped over the St. Croix courts?)

As members of the victims’ families watched this spectacle, I couldn’t help but wonder the insult they must have felt while these jurors giggled on the stand during questioning by the judge – one so much so that she was dismissed. Here’s hoping that some of the giggling was not simply nerves, but embarrassment. No; make that mortification.

We live in a place where the poverty rate is substantially higher than the national average, where families struggle to put food on the table. And yet these jurors need not just pork bacon, but also turkey bacon to start their day, along with an assortment of breads – with and without cheese – different style eggs, pancakes, and a cornucopia of fruit that might rival a brunch display at a resort hotel.

This, however, was not a Saturday Night Live skit. There’s just nothing funny about murder – or a murder trial. Surely the jury will realize that as they listen to the testimony. If breakfast ever ends, that is.

Barbara Birt